Why Am I Sad After Amazing Sex?

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Betty Dodson

Dear Betty,

I have recently experienced something confusing and I would love your perspective. I met a man with whom I have unprecedented chemistry. We had mind-blowing sex, he was by far the best lover I ever had. In a way, he encompasses all the best skills and attributes of many of my previous / other lovers. Still, I cannot shake off feelings of sadness that I experienced just after a very intense orgasm with him.

My first question to him after coming was 'are you happy in life?' as if I tapped into some sadness of unknown origin. Have you ever experienced anything like that?

How to know if this sadness is mine or his (ie. I could have felt it due to intense interpersonal connection?


Dear N,

Really good orgasmic sex can bring up wondrous feelings. My first thought was the sadness was because the sex was over but it can be repeated again. If not with Mr Wonderful, maybe even with yourself!

Now there is a scary thought....having the best orgasm with yourself. I would just own the feeling as my own, and not his. After all, who wants a good thing to end?

Dr. Betty

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