Orgasm is never about losing control. It's about being in total control.
You need to be masturbating regularly with your preference for clitoral stimulation while practicing vaginal penetration.
Sharing masturbation would make the most sense instead of trying to give each other an orgasm.
Most important is to enjoy what feels good and communicate when something is uncomfortable.
I recommend having safe sex with a variety of girls to learn what you are looking for.
Just have your birth control in place then feel free to use him for your first experiment with "going all the way."
Most women can't orgasm from penetration alone. Your clitoris is your primary sex organ.
Never underestimate the energetic and healing powers of having consistent orgasms at every age throughout our lifetimes.
Guilt and shame will block your orgasms especially with a partner.
Faking orgasm is universal because we're not taught the basics of female sexual response.