Betty Dodson with Carlin Ross

Better Orgasms. Better World.

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I'm 19 and have been dating a phenomenal (a bit older) guy for a little more than 9 months. We have decided to postpone intercourse until we both feel ready (he doesn't yet and I don't either). The sex we have is really incredible, he is very patient and we are always learning from each other.

My question is about female ejaculation.I have been masturbating since I was 12 or 13 and have only made myself ejaculate twice (to my knowledge, my detachable shower head and I have always been quite close). When I'm with him, ejaculating is a pretty regular thing.

Betty,

I've been using the magic wand for a few months. I'm 53 and for the first time in a long time enjoying climax. The problem is when ever I reach my climax I urinate. Is this normal? Can I do anything about this. I do this alone. I am married but intercourse has not been good for me for a long time.

I have watched countless tutorials, read countless books on the matter, but for the life of me cannot find my own G Spot. When I masturbate and actually let a finger wander inside my vagina, I can't tell any structure or texture apart in there. It all feels the same. I'd like to be able to find it and try to ejaculate, but I'm not even sure if I've ever come before.

Gathering the information on G Spot orgasms has made me take into account my past orgasmic experiences, which seem paltry in comparison to these super orgasms. Any advice, or any help for finding my little G spot?

Dear R,

Dear Betty,

first of all, thanks for the great job you're doing. You inspire me to explore new ways of my sexuality again and again. Thanks for all those great experiences that really changed me in my self-awareness as well as in relationships to other people.

To the question: Since March I'm experiencing orgasms by the hand of someone else than me for the first time. Now this one reported about something flowing out of my vagina when I orgasm. I immediately thought of female ejaculation and was curious to have found something new about myself again. Yay! So I read about it and found out, that female ejaculation is said to be clear and fluid. But mine is shiny white and rather solid (right word here?).

Hi Betty,

I've been having orgasms for about 6 years now. The first time I had one was with someone else - we both had a "what the heck just happened?!" reaction, since I absolutely soaked the sleeping bag. My orgasms have been like that since - I am definitely a gusher. However, ejaculating is not always an option. I'm spending the next few months away from home - staying with friends, camping, and sleeping in places where excessive use of towels would either be noticed, or not available at all. Can I somehow teach myself to have orgasms without ejaculating?

I love your website, I think it's great, and I've read your 'first time orgasm' but I still can't manage to come. I have what I think is and orgasm (I can only get this through clitoral stimulation, even though when I was reading your 'first time orgasm' I was penetrating too) but I don't seem to ejaculate. I have been masturbating for about 2 and a half years now, and I've had sex before, but I didn't come during that either. Is there something I can do to encourage ejaculation, or am I just simply unable to do it?

I found an article in Discovery Health that referred to the g-spot as part of the clit. Since then I have found two more sources that support this claim; "I *heart* Female Orgasm" by Dorian Solot and Marshall Miller, and "She Comes First" by Ian Kerner. I'm so frustrated, because I'd like to believe these are reputable sources! Is this misinformation leftover from when the g-spot became popular, a case of overzealous clit-pride, or is there some truth to it?

I am 27 years old, never had an orgasm. I'm married 5 years with 2 kids. Just recently, frustrated with myself and with what I am missing, made it my number 1 priority over the next 5 weeks to work on learning how to have an orgasm through masturbation. I read your articles, plus a few books, and began working with the Magic Wand.

Dear Betty:

I want to say thank you and let you know i've shared your site with others and that I have enjoyed your site for many years now. It's just great in so many ways in all your catagories. I hope that this new site will be just as great and that you will still have the old things as well as some new things. Ok now for my question that I am hoping you can help with and I am sure others are interested in it as well.

The subject is "Squirting" and I would love to know how to make or what to do to make women have a "squirting orgasm". Please let me know if you or Carlin can share that knowledge with me and your readers.

I love your website. I consider myself reasonably well informed but I've learned quite a lot from it. I'd appreciate your comments on a problem I have. When my husband stimulates my 'G' spot during his manual manipulation it feels wonderful. The problem is afterward I have frequent, urgent and often false needs to urinate. These sudden feelings of needing to take a pee sometimes go on for several days.

The consequences are so uncomfortable that I discourage him from engaging in the stimulation at all; a shame really. I should mention that I am fifty-five post menopausal and on HRT.

Any advice you can offer would be appreciated. Keep up the good work.

S

Dear S,

Subject: icky female ejaculation

Hi Betty,

I recently read your book Sex for One, borrowed from a friend who was making a documentary about female masturbation. In any case, I am a 21 year-old student who just started exploring my body very recently (on my own that is) and I have come across many interesting things.

For one, it seems that I am an ejaculator. At first, like every other woman, I figured I had peed on myself. But I smelled and checked and made sure it wasn't pee. So the only logical conclusion was ejaculation (and a rather large amount of it too).