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Because Satan Fondles Himself

Sun, 06/19/2011 - 13:11
Submitted by Lawrence Lanoff

On the heels of masturbation month, I’m happy to announce that satan fondles himself.

I discovered this while reading a most enlightening blog entitled, “Is Burning Man to Blame for the Increase in American Teen STD Cases?”

The idea here is that where fun is had, Satan gets off - sending people to hell.

This masterful piece of drivel, filled with powerful literary images like “fecal flinging, sex addicted homosexuals”, describes women’s breasts as “milk sacks”, and pussies as “moist camel humps.”

The blog argues that attending Burning Man is a first class trip - to hell.

When I began reading, I couldn’t decide if it was over the top satire or the delusional writings of a true believer. Unfortunately, it’s latter. The tag line “conservative values in an unsaved world.”

HIV Vaccine Reduces Infection Rate by 31.2%

Thu, 09/24/2009 - 13:20
Submitted by Carlin Ross

Can you imagine what would happen if they had a vaccine that could prevent the transmission of HIV?  There would be a sexual revolution like we've never seen.  We're almost there.

Researchers in Thailand combined 2 earlier experimental HIV vaccines and gave it to 16,000 people.  They found that the chances of catching HIV were 31.2% less for those who had taken the vaccine.  YAY!

A global vaccine is still a ways off but this is exciting news.  Do you think we can get Betty to start throwing group sex parties again?