Betty Dodson with Carlin Ross

Better Orgasms. Better World.

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While it's true that the largest portion of sex life coaching that Betty and I do for our clients surrounds the exciting subject materials, we also are there to coach clients through relationship issues as they pertain to their shared sex life.

This is a blog on my most recent session with a couples client we'll call, "Judy and Keith." They gave me permission to discuss these specific sections of their coaching.

It's finally live. In beta and ready to serve:

www.sexlifecoachnyc.com

My sex life coaching business website. I've been teaching solo for going on three years, but this is my first web home besides my existing presence on D&R. I want to thank Betty and Carlin for their support and Betty again for making my cause a reality and dream come true. I chose her as my mentor in 1999 and I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for her. Thank you, and much love to you, Betty.

My form of sex life coaching is very similar to Betty's, but there are some differences. The biggest is I work with clients via Skype when desired and make house calls.

As I indicated in my previous blog post, a past married couple, who were sex life coaching clients of mine last winter, told me all about how their relationship of just over twenty years was revitalized (and getting better) due in large part to the talk-teach coaching sessions the wife, Nancy (name changed), had with me.

I was sitting one day going over past client contact info, then contacting some of them, seeing how they were doing. I like to keep in touch here and there to see how my sex life coaching helps or sustains their happiness over time. I texted her after being out of contact since January or February and she wrote back with:

"We're doing great!"

I replied: "Do tell!"

Nancy: "He's totally in love with me."

My latest client wrote me an email the other day. It struck me, so I asked her permission to include excerpts in a blog post. She agreed, as long as we changed the names of her and her husband. Read on:

Below is a recent testimonial after our first Guided Session:

The first time I did a physical exam as a medical student, I realized that I entered that very private space we instinctively know not to cross. In a social situation we learn not to stand too close, and when people do not respect our space boundary, we usually feel uncomfortable. I instinctively try to move away. Undressing someone I did not know, and feeling various parts of his or her body felt strange, unnatural, intrusive. I remember doing a genital exam on a young man, only to realize when I was writing up my notes, that I had no recollection of what I had seen or felt.

Talking about sex is an intrinsic part of the work I do. It feels routine when I ask for the details about sex. How do you masturbate? Do you like him to go down on you? Have you tried putting your penis into her vagina slowly with very shallow thrusting? I have to remind myself that outside of my office, these conversations are not routine. In fact, they are bizarre.

Here's some feedback from two clients who had sex life coaching phone session(s) with me. The first one is from a mid-40's woman wanting to learn some strong oral sex skills for a man and the second is from a thirty-something woman who was searching for solutions on how to get better at sex, yet not let classic goal-orientation symptoms occur. I believe a much more accurate term is immediate-success orientation.

Here's an excerpt below of the full article written by Theresa Ikard from www.carnalnation.com on Dr. Marty Klein's workshop on how traditional psychology therapists are not trained to help bring sexual sophistication into their clients' lives. It makes crystal clear how often therapists will use the standard social mores and/or religious-based beliefs as their answers to questions posed to them. Psychologists with sex therapy certifications are an improvement, but based on my research into what they are teaching and their training, their knowledge does not extend beyond basic to intermediate sex information and often it's gathered from statistics and science-only. I'm glad they're out there and I love many of them, but there is more.