Betty Dodson with Carlin Ross

Better Orgasms. Better World.

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The first time I did a physical exam as a medical student, I realized that I entered that very private space we instinctively know not to cross. In a social situation we learn not to stand too close, and when people do not respect our space boundary, we usually feel uncomfortable. I instinctively try to move away. Undressing someone I did not know, and feeling various parts of his or her body felt strange, unnatural, intrusive. I remember doing a genital exam on a young man, only to realize when I was writing up my notes, that I had no recollection of what I had seen or felt.

Talking about sex is an intrinsic part of the work I do. It feels routine when I ask for the details about sex. How do you masturbate? Do you like him to go down on you? Have you tried putting your penis into her vagina slowly with very shallow thrusting? I have to remind myself that outside of my office, these conversations are not routine. In fact, they are bizarre.