Betty Dodson with Carlin Ross
Better Orgasms. Better World.
Pictured below are a stick of lip balm (for scale) a tube of Aloelife water-based lubricant, which is my current water-based lube of choice. Beside it is a mini spray bottle from a store called Muji. Below is our first time trying the Muji sprayer and other first times last weekend morning.
Below is a recent testimonial after our first Guided Session:
"Wow, so our session. Was. Amazing. I was falling into a rut of unsatisfying solo orgasms. I could have one by using my hand, but that usually takes about 20 minutes on a good day. When I use the Hitachi Magic Wand I can get one out in a minute, and though those were the stronger O's I had, they were still leaving me wanting more. When I couldn’t get more out of self-loving I
would give up after about an hour to an hour and a half, and still unsatisfied."
Below is part three of my sex life coaching client Rachel's erotica on her adult doctor-playing scene with her husband Oram. For those who didn't read part one, and part two, I advised Rachel on how to create her scene so her husband, a newcomer to scene play in sex, would have a great first time.
“Wider please,” spoken as she taps, then pushes at the
inside of his thighs, insisting he move his knees apart a bit more. With width
comes the necessary space to work between his ass cheeks.
She stands out of his sight, removes her coat and retrieves
the Aneros Prostate Massager and the lubrication from the tray. Behind him now, where he can’t see
her (as long as he maintains the requested position) she tosses the coat onto
the bed and into his line of sight. He knows she is exposed. His rear cheeks tense
and release in acknowledgement, as a fine mist of perspiration covers his
skin.
Here's part two of my sex life coaching client Rachel's erotica based on her adult doctor-playing scene with her husband Oram. For those who didn't read part one, I advised Rachel on how to create her scene.
How nicely the coat falls open to each side,
presenting her
silk covered legs from the ankles to the bit of bare thigh just above
the
garter clips, as she lowers herself to sit in front of her charming
patient.
Here is the first part of my sex life coaching client Rachel's erotic journaling on her fist foray into roleplay sex as a dominant woman doctor. The topic of one of our sessions was how to create a roleplay doctor fantasy she'd always had and surprise her husband with it. The help I gave Rachel was in how to make the roleplay realistic and believeable. It can be easy sometimes to get a little cheesy, which can disrupt the roleplay's erotic potency. It pulls you back to an awareness that it's not real. Not hot!
The night before last, I co-hosted Planned Parenthood's fundraiser, Summer Sex and Spirits with my mentor, Betty Dodson, and Carlin Ross. I chatted with VIP's before the main event began and had some really fun and interesting conversations about sex and learning sex skills, and also gave some individual sex advice.
Twice that night, and many times in the past, I had to deal with a cliche about me as a man teaching women about sex: that because I don't have a vagina and a clitoris and all the other parts and spots in-between, I allegedly can't possibly be as qualified as a woman's sex life coach.
My complete answer to that is the following:
Here is the link to www.wellandgoodnyc.com and the new online article out about me written by a woman in attendance's take on my Wine and Chocolate Sex Salon for Women. It was a great night with all the women present, about eight of them, leaving happy and thrilled from my sex advice and learning some of what I consider my most important information on female sexuality and female orgasm in its different forms and new ways to use sex toys you may have never thought of before, alone or with your partner.
By the end of the session, one woman, who started out with a viewpoint of sex as "making love" to your beloved is the highest sexform to asking me with a coy-firey voice if I was available to play as non-monogamous lovers-- in the sexform readers of my erotica recognize. The reason I mention this is not to brag. It's to show how a woman sold on the superiority of "making love" became equally interested in high quality carnal sexuality after taking in my info.
This email from 22 yr old Rebecca made my day. I was sitting on my workout bench at Betty's place when I read this on my blackberry. Putting to words the feelings a letter like this stirs in me is difficult.... It's several emotions blended together. The best I can do to describe it is, the thrill of erasing a little suffering from the face of the planet.
Hi there, Eric. :)
So I'm finally getting around to writing this-- I've been pretty busy working and setting things up here in Vermont-- everything is going well though. I hope things are well with you too!
I figure I will just write as though I'm speaking to you (which I am) and you can cut and paste whatever you want to use for your blog. Hope this helps! I mean it all!
Eric,
I just wanted to ask you a question about lube and condoms. If i am giving a guy oral sex and i use flavored lube (water based) but then we decide too have partner sex while we are at it and we have him put a condom on...is that okay? An sex tips? like would the lube already on his penis affect putting the condom on or anything? or would it not affect anything and be fine?
Here is Virginmonoblogger's blog post on how she feels Semen is Sexy. My thoughts on that are I'm happy she gave a perspective on a woman who lusts for ejaculation, the hot clenches of male orgasm, everything that goes with it. It shows the ravenous sex hunger and desire always ascribed to men also manifests itself in women as the counterpart: aching to feel that happen to them. It reminds me of how I condom up and do knock-up hot talk. Where I vocalize the fantasy of coming way up in her, filling her up with sperm and making her pregnant-- belly round and full of baby. Then have amazing sex with her throughout the pregnancy. Olivia and Kristina both love that.
As I said in part one and two of rough sex and objectification, rough sex most often has little to no clitoral stimulation provided by the man because it's all about his pleasure and ravishing her in totality.
However, as www.sexandsubmission.com shows in the videos there, the women get a lot of Hitachi Magic Wand action on their clit, and orgasms, provided by the men lording over their tied up bodies. It made me smile to see how they use black gaffer's tape around the wand's white handle and a black condom over the white vibrating head to make it look all serious and badass. :)
Olivia loves bondage and masculine domination combined with intercourse and oral sex. She revealed to me her subscription to kink.com's site, www.sexandsubmission.com. I got a membership and watched some hot examples. The tying her up part and sexing her while she's helpless, to whatever extent, can be taken to darker psychological places for some people. However, if you're not interested in going there, (I am not) I discovered bondage is still a great tool for turning up the volume so to speak, or intensity, on the psychological erotics that occur between a woman in her most feminine and vulnerable and a man's masculine over her.
I've been reading and investigating the cases of what sex therapy professionals, namely psychologists, are dealing with in their practice so I can reference some of that info in my teaching. One repeated issue is, termed by the conservative mindset, as the objectification of your primary partner with whom you share parenting or not. In this case, the person you've married and spent more than 2 years married to. It makes situations where people meet, have hot erotic-driven sex, marry, then that goes away either because of the responsibilities, fascinations, and energy/attention demands of the child or, with or without children, the law of diminishing returns sets in and the sex isn't as fiery as it started out. I believe objectification is just as necessary as adoration throughout our sex life.
Olivia and I didn't take long to get our clothes off. In fact, she was already in bed when I arrived at her place.
"Clothes! Off! Now!" she exclaimed gleefully.
I laughed and stripped. She threw back the covers to invite me in and to show off her curvy hourglass-carved perfection of a body. We made out. Heavy and light mixed, right there naked together in bed. She did have her pink see-through panties on though.... My hands and attention on her D cups, her slender waist, and broad hips with a tight and full ass behind her. One thing led to another and before long she started scooting down toward the foot of the bed.
Once again, I write blog posts like these to show that there's more to sex advice and incredible sex than how to do it better. All the hot sex skills and sophistication in the universe won't matter if you have health issues that put a stop to your sex life, or make it not what it could be. A sex therapist and a sex life consultant would be clear on that.
Here is a link to a thorough article on how your gut (small intestine) and its state of healthy bacterial vs unhealthy has a big effect on your sex life. From things that make you lose your sex drive, like Irritable Bowel Syndrome, or IBS, chronic urinary tract infections in women, and vaginitis.