Betty Dodson with Carlin Ross

Better Orgasms. Better World.

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Every time I go thru the metal detector and set off the alarms with my titanium hip joints, I'm put in a plexi glass cage to wait for a "Female Assist" to come pat me down. I often joke with the security guards.

In San Diego, there was a sign that said something about "Securitiy is no laughing matter." While standing inside my plexi glass I see the guy pull my bag to look inside. I know it's my Hitachi Magic Wand he's going for so I wave and
make eye contact with him. Than I pantomime humping my vibrator while grinning from ear to ear. The guy can't help but break up laughing and my bag went thru without being searched.

I remember when flying used to be fun but did you know:

Border security can seize your laptop, cell phone or camera with no suspicion or explanation.

Many airports use scanners that conduct a virtual "strip search" of passengers.

There are over one million names on the terrorist watch list.

The TSA recently expressed interest in having every airline passenger wear "electro-muscular disruption" bracelets that could be used to shock passengers into submission.

Tell Congress it's time to rein in travel abuses by the Department of Homeland Security.