Betty Dodson with Carlin Ross

Better Orgasms. Better World.

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hi betty.

i'm young, a freshman in highschool, and it seems like everyone but me is so experienced! i don't even know how to kiss right, if there's even a right way to. all i can think about is sex but i can't figure out how to get rid of my insecurities and get started. first off, i'm scared that a guy will take one look down south and run. how do i know what it's supposed to look like? second, i masterbate using that pressure thing you guys explained, is it bad to keep doing that or should i step it up a notch? i've thought about fingers but i feel like they're gonna be bitten off if i stick them in there. haha. third, what do guys expect? if i am thinking about having sex with a guy, am i supposed to come onto him or will he come onto me? and are girls on top? are there any set rules really? and this is a big question, does it always start so awkward or is it just me? how do you ask someone to be friends with benefits? i've no clue how to do any of this stuff. help betty! get me started!

Dear CR,

The way you start sex is by exploring your own body in the privacy of your room. Use my search engine and pull up "First Time Orgasm." Then take you time reading it more than once and follow the simple step by step directions I've outlined. You need to do some homework by reading books and educating yourself about sex. Also go to the Genital Art Gallery on the website and view all the different forms of genitals so you'll know your vulva is well within the range of normal or average or special...take your pick. As uninformed as you are, guys will be too unless they are older and experienced, but then, that's not always the case either. I have no idea what the "pressure thing" is all about. As for the "how to part" that will come gradually as you gather more information and experience. Be sure you know how to handle your preferred form of birth control before you "go all the way" with penetration sex. I had lots of kissing and manual sex before I did intercourse at twenty. Don't be in such a hurry. You have a lifetime to enjoy all of it.

Dr. Betty