Betty Dodson with Carlin Ross

Better Orgasms. Better World.

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Hello,

I am 42 years old and was raised by parents who did not inform me about sex at all. Believe it or not at this age I am learning as I go. I am an only child and such topics were not discussed it was too embarrasing to them. Unfortunately my mother passed away from cancer when I was 15 so I missed getting what question and knowledge from her was lost. Then when I lost my virginity the experience truthfully was less then what I expected.

So to try to shorten things I got married young and had 4 children and really did not enjoy my sex life ..my husband at the time controlled pretty much everything in the bedroom...he could get his thrills but I knew nothing and just basically let him do his thing and get it over with...anyways what I'm trying to say is I was very unexperienced with my body and what an orgasm was....after years of abuse and being controlled I finally got away and started living again.

I have not had too many lovers but it has been an adventure to find pleasure again.... my question to you is...can a woman get too wet ?....since being with a new man I get aroused quickly and I feel I get too wet...Is there such a thing ? I have friends that complain that they need help and use lubricant but not me ...its like I don't know if I should be embarrased or not......Also what is squirting?

I mean I get the concept I have seen it online but are these women having an orgasm like that or are they actually urinating ? I had a guy ask me if I ever did and no I haven't but he tried to say he could make me do that.....it never happened. I thank you for your time and I feel you are a fantastic lady to help people. Thank you. I hope your able to inform me in some way.

Dear L,

Congratulations on setting yourself free from a controlling husband. Your story is a common one and I hope in the near future, no woman has to ever grow up without any sex information again. Now beware of any new lover who claims he can "make" you come or squirt or whatever. It's your body, your clitoris and your orgasm. Take control and discover what you prefer by masturbating and experimenting with yourself alone.

I've heard from very few women who said their partners complained that they can't get enough friction during fucking because she's too wet. In that case I simply suggest they stop a moment while she mops up the wetness with a tampon. However, the problem might also be the result of a generous vaginal barrel with a small penis. Never be embarassed about your natural bodily functions. Never!

As for squirting or "female ejaculation" not all women do it and many of us don't like the sensation. Use our search engine to find female ejaculation and read my essay. Also research it online. My book "Orgasms for Two" also has a whole chapter devoted to the subject. Perhaps it's time for you to consider investing in a quality vibrator for your selfloving sessions. Just remember, you've had years of being controlled. Now it's your turn to get what you want!

Dr. Betty