Betty Dodson with Carlin Ross

Better Orgasms. Better World.

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Has there ever been someone in your life who you have known for years and always secretly wanted, but never had? 
Mine started five years ago when I was still in high school. I started taking guitar lessons from my the son of my piano teacher. For the purpose of the clarity in writing, we shall call him Bob (hint hint, his name was not Bob). Bob was twenty, and I was fifteen, and I developed a MASSIVE crush on him. I wasn't sexually active yet, but man did I have a fantasy life, and he was the star. I've always loved a man who could play music, and this guy was amazingly talented. And I've also always had a thing for older men, so Bob was my dream man, alive and quite corporeal. And I loved going to his guitar lessons. After a while they kinda stopped being lessons and became more like hangout sessions. He would play me his newest song, or sit down at the piano and play me his version of his favourites. He'd come in with a mix cd of some of his favorite bands and we'd sit and listen to it. I remember sitting there listening to him explain the complexity of the chord progression in this song, or how the lyrics of that one were so amazing, and I was smiling the whole time. He had such passion for the thing he loved. And I used to sit as close as possible to him without making it painfully obvious. I would sit there trying to pay attention and push the fantasies out of my head. But it was never easy. There was this poster that hung on the wall above the old case with the radio/cd/record player, and it always caught my attention. It could have been an album cover or something, but I don't know. I remember it had mountains in it, but from the way it was drawn, they looked like boobs. Looking at that definitely didn't help me stop thinking about sex.
So after about four months of lessons, all of a sudden, he left town, and moved to a different state in pursuit of his fame and fortune. I remember feeling hurt that he left without saying goodbye in person. 
Then five years later, after no word from him, all of a sudden he pops up again. He's moved back to town. As soon as I saw him again every hot sweaty fantasy came flooding back, as if he had never left. But now I was 20. In my head, I actually stood a chance. When we hung out, I made sure I looked good, wearing tight jeans and a shirt that showed off my curvy figure. I flirted with him as best I could. I mean he had to know I had a massive crush on him back then. But alas, he kindly and subtly hinted back that he was not interested...

And that's the one that got away...