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Alright, I'm at a loss. My boyfriend and I have been together for about 2 1/2 years and having intercourse for 2 or so. Most of that time I've been on the pill and we were both virgins so we haven't used condoms except for a few times. We've recently decided to use condoms as well as birth control because we have a mutual friend who got pregnant while on the pill and we really don't want to take chances. Problem is: whenever we try to put the condom on, he loses his erection. We've had a great sex life and haven't had problem like this in the past but it's been going on for a few weeks now. I'm pretty positive it's not health related because he doesnt have problems with erections in any other situations. It's to the point where he doesn't even want to have intercourse anymore because he's so frustrated about losing his erection. Does anyone have any suggestions?!
It's all about relaxation
When a man hurries up to put a condom, he loses the erection... the opposite
of what he's trying to do.
The key here is not to hurry... this hurry creates anxiety, combined with the
fear that you will lose your erection.
I wrote a little more in-depth on it here:
How to Prevent Losing your Erection while putting on a Condom
Should work like a charm...
my advice
I agree with both Moonlight and Orchid's info. Moonlight's info with putting a condom on with your mouth can be hot and it's a more intimate way to put it on than the guy doing it. The transition of getting it on can break the mood for some because it's largely devoid of hotness. One psychological game you can play, in adition to the ones I describe below, is you can make your partner beg for the condom to go on, because that's the only way her hungry cunt will be fed with your hard dick. Tease her, make her go down on you longer, work you with one hand and her clitoris with the other so you can watch her, over her. Keeping her in her place (for the sake of the dominant sex vibe youre making) till she cant wait to watch you put the condom on, or you let her do it.
Another good strategy is be going down on your partner's pussy or breasts, use your fingers inside her wetness while working her clit with your tongue, or combining breast suckling with clit play... anything that keeps you hard while she opens the condom and prepares to put it on with her mouth.
I find it hotter when the woman opens it than when the man does because it does a hot little psychological thing, at least to me, that here is a profuckingactive woman who wants to fuck my cock. She's ripping that condom out to get me into her achy wetness asap. When i've been on first-time sex dates and that happens, I always feel that way. Psychological hotness keeps dicks hard, or tends to. If doing safe sex, she can work you with her hand and then look into your eyes and tell you how bad she needs her cunt wrapped around your cock. RIP goes the condom wrapper, pops between her o-shaped lips, then slowly down goes her head. She lubes my dick with a good lubricant, and her fuck begins. With your gf, she can go down on your cock while she opens the condom, then puts it on with her mouth, then goes down once more to lube with her saliva, then takes you in her pussy right away or returns to harder oral sex than what she can do without a condom, i.e. Orchid's advice, to rise him back to where he can penetrate.
Another tip, whenever I have issues with rising my penis to at least 90% erection, what works for me is squeezing and relaxing my PC muscle while feeling the inside of her pussy with two fingers, or, masturbate my lubed and condom-wrapped cock with one hand while my fingers -feel- inside her hot sex organ. What I mean by that is you get off, psycholgically and physically on how that feels, looking down or up at the beautiful sexy woman you're inside of, how her slippery inner curves feel to your fingers, listening to her hot talk or your own, you get the idea. Very often, once youre inside her, cock finishes his rise to 100%. I think of 125% as his size when he is about to ejaculate. Let me know how that works for you. And set up a sex life consulting session when you are ready for more!
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It's notthing uncommon
I came across this problem listening to Dan Savage. Putting on a cold condom sometimes has this effect. What he advises is not to wait till the last moment to put on a condom and when the erection drops just bring it back. It went down so it can go up.
Try Flavoured Condoms
I'm sorry to hear this. Have you tried using flavoured condoms?
You can slip it on as part of an oral session, a little extra oral once it is first put on can do the trick. You can even help put it on with you mouth. Please let me know if this helps.