Recent comments

  • I Don't Understand Why I Don't Like Being Touched   14 weeks 3 days ago

    Dear E,

          I would echo what Betty said. Yours is a
    most interesting question as well suited for this blog it is dedicated to
    learning about physical contact between intimates as well as between strangers
    (Betty’s group sex). The romance novels would lead us to believe your anxiety
    is rear but in reality all of us suffer from the same sort of fear of being
    exposed to others. Men seem to shake it off easier than woman it’s why they
    arouse faster but we all have the same neurobiologies that get in the way of
    how we think we aught to be.

          Your aversion to being exposed a bit more pronounced but all triggers activate similarly below our Level of Consciousness. Therefore it is NOT a question being touched or even the trigger that activates this emotion. The question is how we deal with the emotions form
    the trigger that leads to change. It has nothing to do with how much you do or
    don’t love either yourself or your husband.

     

          Oddly as you point out touching by strangers is easier than with someone you depend on like your husband. That’s not at all surprising. It is likely that after marriage the reactions to being exposed (touched) became greater. What you are experiencing is
    neurobiologically speaking normal! If you look at this through an Attachment
    Lens there is certain logic. It is that you are so much in love; depend so
    heavily on him for your well being that risking loosing that unconditional
    support from him is fearful. Fearful because of some trigger totally unrelated
    to your life with him activates. And you have these feelings of aversion
    despite sexual lust and vivid fantasies. It’s confusing like a lot of what our
    primal neuralgic system does for us with out our awareness or consent.

          Discovering the cause of the trigger is no where near as important as reprogramming your brain to deal with the triggers differently when they occur. You must do the due diligence to find a skilled therapist who has a track record in helping people explore and deal
    with themselves. Most therapists don’t! Most therapists have real problems
    exploring sex. The your therapist should have to have a firm understanding of
    what is happening with your neurobiology and show you and your husband
    method(s) to reappraise, self and social regulate. You might want to check out
    EFT (Emotionally Focused Therapy) counselors Certified by Susan M. Johnson (http://www.iceeft.com/ ) or
    look into the John and Julie Gottman approach. Sue Johnson is all about very
    focused therapy with a very limited number of visits. Beware of your best
    friend who has sees the best counselor in your town for six months to years.
    You don’t want to wait indefinitely for results to come to your sex life and
    your bonded relationship.

           With Johnson and Gottman you will find your husband to be a great ally, source of great support, and understanding. These approaches are about learning to support each other through learning about human neurobiology. While what you are experiencing may be disconcerting it is your neurobiologically speaking normally about a trigger in the context
    of human attachment! We all have to learn how deal with our own and each
    other’s neurology - that’s normal. That process is made much easier if you gain
    emotional knowledge from academic research and people who have developed
    therapeutic approaches from that science.

           Enjoy life, husband, baby and sex!

  • New just joined   14 weeks 5 days ago

    Now back and enjoying the posts here.
    I'm a retired older (67) married guy with a strong sex drive that isn't always satisfied by my dear wife. In recent years I have turned more and more to solo masturbation for fun and sexual relief.
    I love edging and long play sessions and have gotten quite kinky as time goes by.
    Wife knows I masturbate but has no idea how much or the length and kinkiness of my solo sessions.
    Cheers,
    R

  • Is My Penis Too Small?   14 weeks 5 days ago

    Hi Sorry is that a bone pressed erection length 6 inchs, seems more like a 5 to me after seeing a few.

    Try looking on www.pegym.com at the photos your see what I mean, but join and enjoy some exercising you could if you want become an 8, but its not a quick fix takes time to get some good improvements, but your find its well worth doing it. OK

    NOWHARD

  • I Need to Practice Delaying Ejaculation. Should I Cheat or Masturbate?   14 weeks 5 days ago

    Hi See if this helps you, for some better and harder erction, a good cockring could be a winner for you as me I have a hardwear ice, works for me and get some real good boners.

    Next get over to www.pegym.com on there start you way into gaining some extra cock, by exercising, the added bonus is your be getting some extra blood down your penis, all very helpful for getting better erctions, your find also a very good site for getting some extra help.

    Have a look on the exercise and health forum, your find NOWHARDS MIX, this mix is aimed at our blood, get your blood working right and your 2/3 of the way to getting better erctions, mix that withexercising and edging, your soon be back to your old self. OK

    NOWHARD

  • I Need to Practice Delaying Ejaculation. Should I Cheat or Masturbate?   14 weeks 6 days ago

    I find that when my wife and I of many years do have sex, it is quite good but I often cum too quickly. Long gone are the days when we'd screw for up to an hour in different positions.
    So in recent years I masturbate solo almost daily and find that if I have masturbated at least 6-12 hours before we screw, that I can maintain my control better and pump her more rigourously with a stiff cock. The Viagra helps too!
    When I am edging, which I really love doing, I can keep from cumming for several hours of off and on cock play. This is not only very pleasurable, it does help train my mind/penis to know how and when to stop or slow down the wonderful sensations I'm experiencing.
    My wife knows I masturbate, but she has little idea how much I do it nor the length of my edging sessions.
    We have masturbated together and  enjoyed it but I'd love to share more masturbation, edging and kinks with her. I think she'd find it all too "weird". 

  • I Need to Practice Delaying Ejaculation. Should I Cheat or Masturbate?   14 weeks 6 days ago

    It is quite natural for men that they are facing quick ejaculation problems while during sex. Therefore, before having sex they used to take the help of masturbating to delay ejaculation. But this is not the permanent solution for us, we definitely need professional for delay ejaculation, so that we can easily improve our sexual satisfaction and experience.

  • Our Favorite Lubricants   15 weeks 20 hours ago

    I really enjoyed the paragraph on Astroglide. Hilarious! Your points about Glycerin are spot on too. I'd recommend checking out the lubes from Wicked Sensual in addition to Sliquid. On the topic of coconut oil, it's important to note that oil based lubes shouldn't be used with latex condoms. Can You Use Coconut Oil as Lube? is a helpful article to learn how to use coconut oil for more than masturbation.

  • Gender Roles are Created by Society Not Biology   15 weeks 1 day ago

    It is true that the gender roles are created by the society, not biology. All people have a different character and they behave differently. If there occur some variations in the gender then people will discard then form the society and there are many people like this who suffer from gender problems.wholesale ipads for cheap

  • New just joined   15 weeks 2 days ago

    I get more joy and satisfaction than most when I masturbate because I use my lipps. I bend over and grab my thighs to pull my head closer to my penis. Sometimes it takes a little longer to get there but I know I can do it and the reward is sooo much.
    Then, I lick and get my penis wet as I can so I can suck it. I try to not come as quick as possible. Moreover, I suck until I get so very excited then I stop sucking and jackoff for a while. And begin sucking after a very short time again.
    Its good. It is where I become so very excited and tense. Inevitably, my intensity is unavoidable. I explode into my mouth a powerful squirt and jerking motions of my body cause me to enjoy the rest of the day in rememberance. HAPPY.

  • It was an Experience Beyond Words   15 weeks 3 days ago

    Dear Betty and Carlin,

    It was a pleasure to see both of you on the video (http://dodsonandross.com/videopodcast/bodysex-summit) so happy and connected after the Bodysex retreat. What ever had been going on with you and between you was evident far beyond the few lines you shared in “Bodysex Builds Compassion” (http://dodsonandross.com/blogs/carlin-ross/2017/08/it-was-experience-bey...): “She's never wanted to read all day or pudder around like she does now. I've felt responsible because I can't be available for her like I used to…”, We've fought...argued...walked away...sat back down again...and agreed but this past weekend was different. It felt like we had broken through something, transcended to a place of understanding and deeper commitment…. Betty wants to retire. I want to take a brief sabbatical.”

    In life things do not stay the same. Rejoicing in the possibility that what bonds you two together and this internet site is realization of the connection between your neurology not the compatibility of your circumstances. It seems from the distance of a reader that it is Carlin’s transformation to parenthood not Betty’s creeping ageing that has most dramatically changed the circumstances. What we as readers refreshingly may be seeing is those demands of changing circumstances by definition change the relationship but that does not mean the changed circumstance also leads to the divorce of the bonds.

    When I was young my experience was with ditzy mothers of my friends and I used to think it was because they were adult woman. Later I noticed these women became grounded and sensible and I thought the ditzyness was an age phase. It was only with my own children I realized ditzyness was a factor of the circumstance, ‘small children’, not being, age or gender. Loved your diaphragm story! And it became clear circumstances need not disrupt but can lead to deeper bonds with others and better understanding of self and them.

    It was pleasing to see the smiles on your faces in the video. I took this to mean even though the your circumstances are changing there is a recognition that the relationship the work you do together is to a large degree circumstance dependent but the bond that makes the connection possible endures and transcends the circumstances of the relationship.

    To me that is what life everlasting means. It is how Carlin can have her work with Betty, a child, a husband and have bonds with them all despite the circumstances. It means that Betty stays bonded, present with Carlin in her retirement twilight and beyond regardless of circumstance. What is dangerous to bonded connection and why people pull away is they equate changed circumstances with unreliable bonds. In realty bonds can remain stable and supportive in spite of all life’s changed circumstances from birth to life eternal.

    What I think I saw and wanted to check with you to see if the joy was the realization that your bonds within and between you can remain regardless of how circumstances change?

  • My Urethral Opening is Above My Clitoris!   15 weeks 4 days ago

    I found this thread because I have the same anatomy. My urethra is above my clitoris. I always thought that there was something wrong with me. Im glad to see that Im not the only one.

  • Happy Independent Orgasm Day for All Women Everywhere   15 weeks 5 days ago

    Thanks for the post.
    It is great that you decided to go deeper into history.
    Great opportunity to draw an analogy with the present time.
    Jaher,
    GradeScout

  • Truly Being Vulnerable Means I Do So Without Knowing That I Will Be Received   15 weeks 6 days ago

    The point here is personal embarrassment. People with "invisible"
    diseases that do not show outwardly to the general public are often the
    brunt of societal intolerance and misunderstanding. "Friends" abandon
    those who may be prematurely ill, because a young lifestyle and mindset
    are not mature enough to deal with these illnesses. One's social circle
    becomes smaller, there are few people to rely upon, and a story like
    this one ensues. You must be your own advocate, firmly but gently. As essay writers point out, Fibromyalgia, Autoimmune, Genetic, Ehlers Danlos, or even cancer and
    heart disease in young person are all very difficult things.

  • Bodysex is More Relevant with Each Passing Day   16 weeks 1 day ago

    Thought you might be interested in this alternative to bodysex described here:

    https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2017/aug/02/vivid-vulvas-and-colossal-carrots-what-i-learned-from-my-night-at-a-sex-workshop

    I can't imagine how a mixed gender event would work, but more education has to be a good thing.

  • I Finally Went Public with a Masturbation Video   16 weeks 1 day ago

    Hi Marias, I'd like your opinion of a video I made. May I send?

  • How Can I Reduce the Chance of Farting While Reaching Orgasm?   16 weeks 3 days ago

    within past year i have come to have full body orgasm that will go on for hours in consession but it is intense and i have the same problem i bear down like child birth and have wanted to not have sex or to hold back now because of it . thank you for your replies i will try this ginger

  • Let’s Shed the Sinister Shame Garments & Joyfully Hang   16 weeks 3 days ago

    But I do not masturbate in restaurants for having an erection!


    Source: Soda1 on Excite Pics

  • If I Enjoy Anal Play, Am I Gay?   16 weeks 3 days ago

    I really like anal playing but I'm not gay!!!


    Source: Soda1 on Excite Pics

  • I'm Restoring My Foreskin   16 weeks 3 days ago

    I grow longer as I grow older but I do not like it.

    Source: Soda1 on Excite Pics

  • I'm Worried About My Penis Size   16 weeks 3 days ago

    I have a tiny blob on my dick because I have blood and I have no meat dick.


    Source: Soda1 on Excite Pics

  • Male Genital Shame   16 weeks 3 days ago

    Source: Soda1 on Excite Pics

  • Donating Your Penis For Posterity   16 weeks 3 days ago

    Source: Soda1 on Excite Pics

    Source: Soda1 on Excite Pics

  • Is My Penis Too Small?   16 weeks 3 days ago

    Source: Soda1 on Excite Pics

  • How Big is a Big Penis?   16 weeks 3 days ago

    Average penis but huge balls

    Source: Soda1 on Excite Pics

  • I Finally Went Public with a Masturbation Video   16 weeks 3 days ago

    I'm sorry you deleted the video. I like to watch men's masturbation.

    Source: Soda1 on Excite Pics