Betty Dodson with Carlin Ross

Better Orgasms. Better World.

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I feel like Assy McAsserson. I used a store brand pore strip and it ripped off a layer of skin off my nose. I have a scar right in the center of my nose and I hate it. I feel like a little bitch for whining about it now. I always get extremely butt-hurt over facial scars for some reason.

I'm sorry it happened to you and if anyone kicks your ass for feeling down then... I dunno, they can fuck off. We like to feel pretty and it's hard to adjust when something new pops up and throws off our usual perception of self-beauty.

For what it's worth, I think it's fantastic that you can physically cry about your scar. Just as you said, it can be cathartic. I seem to have lost my ability to cry. Fuck, I miss it and I hope I can get it back.

Everyone has scars, and a lot of people, myself included, wish they could get rid of a few of them.  Scars really aren't that a big deal, though.  We're always the most critical of ourselves.

to grieve for what has been lost to the past, whether it is a loved one, our former selves, or the way we used to look. 

So as long as the sympathy does not begin to consume your life, I say cry your heart out and seek your sympathy and keep being the beautiful individual you are.

I have more scars than I would like to admit to. A lot of them are due to my own stupidity. Cuts and burns all over my fingers (I used to be a hairdresser and I would periodically slice a finger open or grab my hot styling tools the wrong way), piercings I've removed, a huge scar on my left foot that I've had since I was nine and will never go away...

The worst is the stretch marks, since there are so many, but I understand about facial scars. I have some acne scarring, and the cartilage across the bridge of my nose is actually broken because I constantly rub my nose (damn allergies) and I used to do it too hard when I was a kid. Sometimes people notice, sometimes not.

The thing that gets the most comment, though, is, I have these weird dry patches on either side of my nose that sometimes get inflamed and scabby. Worst of all, my dermatologist said it's actually a yeast infection and it'll probably never get better. Hooray. I get to have scabby places on my nose forever, no matter what time of year it is.

But you know what? I try my best not to worry about it, because imperfection is beautiful. It's what makes us human. People aren't meant to look like department store mannequins. I'm sure that your scar isn't anywhere near as bad as you think it is- we always see things as bigger problems than they really are.

Oh, WildOrchid, thank you so much for sharing yourself with us! I agree with the comment above that imperfection is beautiful.

I remember my first facial scar (besides a chicken pox scar from when I was very little). My glasses broke when I was eleven and the lens sliced into my eyebrow. Unless I waxed my brows until they were tiny little lines, which is a look I don't wish for myself, the scar is smack-dab in the middle of my brow and it's there. It's part of my face. It's a memory of where I've been, like you and others have mentioned above.

You are wonderful, beautiful, and glorious. Thank you again for sharing yourself, your sadness, and your videos.

Hey, I just wanted to comment on the yeast aspect of the post.  Doctors will tell you that yeast will either never go away or that you need antibiotics or something for it.  A lot of people think that you can only get yeast infections vaginally but truthfully you can get them anywhere on your body.  I'm 19 I have been suffering from vaginal yeast infections since I was 12.  I didn't know what it was so I never said anything, when it finally got so bad that I couldn't handle it anymore I told my mom and by that point it had worked its way into my bowels and the doctor prescribed me antibiotics for it which caused more and more and more yeast infections for the next 6 years. I couldnt go a freakin month without getting one. So I started doing my own research.  Typically It's a diet thing, if you can cut out everything that yeast lives off, SUGAR!!, starch, cooking yeast, wheat, ect. I bet it would go away. Now im not that displined and can't fallow a diet so restricting but I tried and cut a lot of things out of my diet for a while, also I'm not sure where you live, or the regulations on natural health supplements in your country.  But I live in Canada, and I bought this stuff called Candigone, and candizyme, from a local health food store and I have not had one single yeast infection in over a year.  Sorry that was a lot of babbling, I like to share the information I've gathered on this because I suffered for so long and not one doctor told me what I actually needed to do.

WildOrchid, thank you for sharing...both the video, and your thoughts. You are brave and wonderful. It's what's inside that matters, and we all have flaws. 

Thanks for sharing this. I love your posts and wish you self acceptance and self love.
This may sound, "out there," but I would suggest trying coconut oil...unrefined. It has removed skin tags and scars on friends of mine. You may want to google it. I hate giving advice, but this seem so benigh, that it couldn't hurt to try, and you'll smell very tropical :)
Best to you!

And I hope yours fades. I don't see why it's wrong for you to feel badly about your scar, it seems like you are not letting it rule your life. I have a chicken pox scar on my forehead that the other kids in school used to give me shit about as well as the usual stretch marks, a couple of small burn scars (from cooking) and a couple on my left leg. I usually worry more about my grey hair (it seems to grow faster than regular hair), the way the summer heat turns my facial pores into these crater looking things, and the annoying facial hair that women over a certain age seem to get plagued with. This isn't meant to diminish your feelings, more as a way of saying that all of us can look in the mirror and focus on the ugly. Maybe your derm can prescribe something for the scar like Mederma or something to help it.

At the end when you talked about what your scar symbolized, it really hit at home for me. I too have struggled with this for a very long time. In my mid 20s I went through some deep depression and gained a lot of weight. Before this I was in great shape and after I had an abundance of stretch marks around my navel and my armpits. When I was obese I also had some issues with folliculitis and MRSA, so I have a few scars from that as well. 
I'm now in a much better place professionally, physically and mentally. But the scars are still there. I socialize and flirt frequently, but balk at any type of intimacy or sex beyond the vanilla. Sex with the lights off is the only way I can feel comfortable. My erotic imagination is vast, but I have not yet fully gotten past my shame over what I did to my body. The stretch marks are faded but they will never go away completely. This is coupled by some loose skin from getting back into shape. When I think of what stretch marks symbolize, I think of a beautiful mother growing to provide nutrition for her young. Perfectly acceptable. What do they symbolize for me? That I was mentally weak and lacked the perserverance needed in my most trying times? That I gave in to unhealthy vices and stopped caring for my appearance? I'm intensely self-critical so I really have a tough time letting go of some of this stuff.
I love sex and the connection made between two (or more) people with chemistry but I feel like I am only giving of a portion of myself so I don't enjoy it as fully as I could. I know ultimately that I just have to let it go and live my life. I've started with baby steps. When I go to my local YMCA to exercise, I will hop in the pool and swim a few laps. Sans shirt will hopefully lead to comfort being sans culottes under the lights.
In my opinion and anecdotal experience, Mederma is total snake oil quackery and doesn't work at all. YMMV!

I love the support everyone is giving you and really appreciate you talking about this. I have more scars and things I am self conscious of than I can count. I have a quote that I remind myself of sometimes that really helps:

"If you look at a tree, you'll notice all of its knobs, and dead branches, much like our own bodies. What you'll find is that beauty and imperfections go together wonderfully."

i had my spine fused when i was 12 so i've had a scar that i refer to as my 'butt crack that ends at my neck' for a long time now... at first i was worried how my partner would feel about seeing it, i used to worry that it would gross them out or scare them off. 
but that's never happened and so much time has passed now that i forget sometimes that its even there! it is hard to accept that your not going to look like you once did, its like a part of you is gone and you have to grieve and move on. besides, having a scar show and tell is a great way to get someone naked!