Betty Dodson with Carlin Ross

Better Orgasms. Better World.

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A couple of years ago I’ve heard about “The 30-Day Sex Challenge” and thought BS. Compulsory vaginal penetration every day of the week, no mater if you feel good or are sick, if you want to express your love or would rather break something after your last fight is not something I would agree to. How come I’m starting this month with “31-Days Self-Pleasure Challenge”?

Lack of privacy, spending hours surfing the net and accomplishing nothing (not having a great time either), significant reduction in the quality of my solitary sex life – those are the main reasons. The other one is that unlike in the original challenge here I have to only factor in myself and the most exciting thing: almost anything goes.

So, what are the rules?

• I get to masturbate every day.
• Tension quickies with my clit vibe and 3 minutes of stimulation don’t count. I have to at least think up a decent fantasy.
• I have to use every toy that hasn’t hurt me at least twice during the month.
• I write up one of the fantasies I had during the week. I try to do it in English, tough Polish is better than nothing. I don’t get to censor myself. The fact that only about 0.00001% of people would find my kinks hot doesn’t matter.
• If somebody proposes an activity, position, technique etc. in the comments I’ll give it an honest try provided it’s relatively safe.

Update 01

I’ve started with a bang - yesterday's session was so awesome that I should write about it while the details are fresh. For mental stimulation I used porn: a scene from Nina Hartley’s Guide to Double Penetration, a scene with Felony and Dana from Everything Butt that I’ve jerked off to before, a clip of an attractive man self-fucking and some unnamed enema porn that I had on my laptop. What was different than usual was that I was very aroused by women’s and men’s shouts and moans of pleasure. They seemed very genuine and went straight to my clit. When I was doing a re-play I timed myself to orgasm around the time the characters did – it had a terrific effect.

I started with clit play then added Tantus Acute – my newest dildo. It felt wonderful but soon my clit vibe started dying. I switched it for my wand – adding a small towel to soften the vibes. It’s no Hitachi but it’s still as gentle as a jackhammer and it doesn’t have speeds – only 12 patterns . I never know which pattern I will like when I switch it on. Yesterday it was 8, which I’ve found terribly annoying for months. I continued in that fashion for some time, going back to the weak vibe once in a while to avoid numbing my clit. I managed to test a new position – kneeling. Verdict: it works well with good mental stimulation; needs to be tested in harsher conditions.

When felt loose and juicy I took out my glass dildo. Its big bulb went in easily and I started massaging the front wall of my vagina with it. I remembered the last podcast. I didn’t find any area, organ or spot that felt better than others but my orgasms were still strong, the blanket beneath me soft (and dry) and the porn hot as hell so I didn’t even have a chance to feel disappointed.

When I was more or less finished I decide to try anal. A couple of days ago I had a horrible experience – I used too much force to push a butt pug in and then fell asleep with it still in. Getting it out was not only painful but also dangerous. I don’t know if I will ever go back to that plug. It’s silicone but the shape is difficult to get out or in. When it’s in it feels rather brilliant. So I started with my fingers. I’ve never hurt myself with fingering – it’s always good so I decided I might as well give it a go. I stayed longer on four (not all the way in) and did some breathing exercises.

Then I put lube on the Acute and pressed it against my ass. “Blink” and it was in. I couldn’t believe what happened! The head of the Acute is bigger than lots of things I’ve struggled to insert. And it goes in easier than a hot knife into butter. I think the material has a lot to do with it. Smooth silicone that has zero drag but in some magical way manages to keep the lube on. The fact that I did the breathing exercises and that I was half-way to brain-dead from previous orgasms didn’t hurt either.

I tried thrusting but I wasn’t very enjoyable because of the lack of texture and I was too lazy to find a good position (I don’t get off on my side). So I left it there like a plug and got off with the wand.

All in all I've managed to have about 10 orgasms. Two in the morning na the rest in the evening.

Today I’ve found another Tantus toy for a reasonably cheap price. It’s anal and it has texture. Guess who’s be happy ;)

 
Update 02: Monday
I didn’t have any privacy for the whole day and to be frank my muscles were a bit sore from the previous day’s effort. To complete my assignment I turned my computer off for the night earlier than I normally would have and went to the bathroom to get ready for bed. Just as I was lying down my sister decided to do the same so I had a couple minutes while she was washing. I took my clit vibe, turned it on (since I forgot to recharge the batteries again the only speed it had was low) and started fantasizing. I decided on a fantasy that incorporated my fetish and some power dynamics, borrowing characters from my favorite fandom. It’s funny how I can’t get into reading Harry Potter fan fiction anymore but still fantasize about the characters. It’s a bit like fantasizing about an ex. Just as I was getting into it she was coming back so I had to turn the vibe off. I bided my time, developing my fantasy, getting wetter and wetter. When it was safe for me to start again I decided against using my clit vibe – it’s pretty quiet but can still wake somebody and it wouldn’t probably get me off anyway. Taking out the wand was a suicide move since that thing is louder than a blender. So I decided to use Acute and my fingers. It worked surprisingly well. The orgasm was stronger and longer than my usual hand-made ones and I didn’t feel overstimulated at all.
Update 03: Tuesday

This time I recharged two sets of AAAs and fed them to my clit vibe and my Butterfly Kiss. I decided to use the latter since I felt I neglected it since I’ve got new toys. The vibrations felt much weaker than usual and I got off on the third speed that normally was off limits. What an orgasm! My body seized and my head and shoulders were lifted and then crashed on the matters. I sometimes have those orgasms: the most powerful ones caused tree lifts and falls each. I’m glad to see them return.
Update 04: Wednesday

Had to use my sister’s evening bathroom visit as a privacy source again. This time it was particularly irritating since I had a new toy to try. I’ve bought myself a new rabbit. This time it was TPR Jessica Rabbit Slim from Living Joy. When I unpacked it earlier at my grandma’s (who’s been so kind lending me her address to have new toys shipped to!) I couldn’t figure out the controls! Me! Me, who learns all the devices in no time. I finally did figure it out but I didn’t get to enjoy it then (if you don’t count two minutes after doing a mountain of washing up – I don’t). So I tried to enjoy the new rabbit. And failed. The rotation on this thing is weak-ass. I gave up, put the clit stimulator on the continuous speed (no low-mid-high – what’s with me and vibes that have only patterns?!) and had a tension orgasm. I decided it doesn’t break the no-3-minutes-tension-orgasms rule because it was way out of my pattern that the rule is designed to break.

Update 05: Thursday

This time I used my sister’s TV break to get off. I tried the rabbit once more, this time without high expectations. The rotation still sucks ass. On the second thought: no it doesn’t. If it sucked ass it would get me off in no time. But it doesn’t suck anything. It doesn’t work. The vibe stops rotating as soon as it’s in my cooch.  Don’t even have to clench my muscles. That said it wasn’t a complete waste of time (and money). The clit stimulator has some nifty patterns. The first is a subtle pulse. When I felt it I thought “helicopter”. It’s quite gentle but I managed to get off to it with the shaft inserted and shut off. Then I tried other patterns and got off again to the last that’s “helicopter pattern” escalating to a steady pulse. It was very exciting because it kept me on edge, hoping to get off on the next increase, but only climbing higher and higher. I finally forced the orgasm by clenching. I think that was a mistake. I wonder what would happen if I let the orgasm come more naturally. Of course my sister barged in the middle of the session because she couldn’t sit through the commercials and made a huge fuss. *Insert accusations of being addicted for daring to have some orgasms when other people are home*. When I was alone again I decided I wasn’t satisfied and I took out my Acute and the wand. (The rabbit uses AAAs so my clit vibe would be weak again). That last one was fun!

Update 06: Friday

Visited my grandma and got off with her sleeping in front of a blaring TV in the other room. I’ve got a new pattern:  get wet through a fantasy (or porn), stick Acute in the pussy, put a vibe on the clit and BOOM. This has to evolve or I’ll bore you and myself.

Update 07: Saturday

I failed. I broke the first rule. It wasn’t a completely lost as a “day of self-pleasure” since I got to re-watch Inception. Too bad I fell asleep before Eames and Arthur got to do the nasty in my head.

Update 08: Sunday

Used the new pattern listening to Christopher Hitchens read his book. Done it twice to make up for the lost day. Or maybe because he was talking about boys jerking off in the old-fashioned public boarding schools.

Update 09: Monday

I’ve got a solution to the privacy issue. It’s not ideal but better than nothing: get up earlier, just after my sister leaves for Uni. I start later on Mondays and Tuesdays. That’s hours of possible wank-time. I did this today and used my pattern for half an hour. It’s 11:30 PM now. I will try to get one more orgasm today: just with my hands. Haven’t done that in a while.