Betty Dodson with Carlin Ross

Better Orgasms. Better World.

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This is an expose about the benefits of drinking alcohol – in moderation of course.

It seems politically incorrect to toast the positives about drinking, almost hush hush. People won’t say when they drink, if they occasionally do, the match network patrons all check off ”drink socially" on their profiles. And I suppose that by posting this, I will hear that I am an “in denial“ alcoholic and “who does she think she’s kidding.”

So anyway, as I was whispering, there really are great benefits to drinking responsibly (lets just agree that’s what I mean and I won’t have to use a disclaimer again.”)

Here’s a story. I was in a restaurant the other night, about 6:30. Beautiful, classy, quiet place. Next to me is seated a couple, I assume long married, and the wife is chatting away. The husband is barely showing any signs of life. He’s chewing his bread; he’s pale and unsmiling. His wife continues to attempt engagement but he seemingly is too caught up in his plate to notice her.

Somewhere into the second half of their glasses of wine, what do you know, the man responds. He begins to ask questions, make comments, and even look at her when she’s talking. And I think, what was that about.? And then I realize, Alcohol— the great social lubricant.

For many of us, alcohol just makes us feel better. Gloominess and shyness seem to miraculously disappear. People become friendly and conversational. Okay, some put lampshades on their heads, but I’m not talking about them.

The world is a fairly unfriendly place, it is a confusing place and causes many of us to hide out sometimes, be aloof, appear snooty or unapproachable. There is a lot of evidence to suggest that what this is really about is social anxiety, an inability to easily engage with others, to be fearful and withdrawn. Alcohol can lift the prohibition to start a conversation and generally create an aura of self-possession and calm. Therapy works too, to an extent, but is not a personality changer.

The so-called recreational drugs like pot for instance can have the same medicinal effect. A little bit of a joint can make anything funny or more can put someone to sleep. It can also make you fat.

Alcohol is so popular because it works. Life is difficult and I am not one to sermonize or wave the moral flag because we may all need a little help. Have you ever seen a romantic old movie, say with Clark Gable or Humphrey Bogart that doesn’t reek of cigarettes and booze? It’s part of the scenery. It just wouldn’t be the same. And it’s not just that it was that time, although it was, but it told of mystery and a little danger and some irresponsibility. Can’t be a grown up all the time.

I tell my clients when they apologetically share that they have a cocktail at night, or sheepishly admit to loving wine, its ok, I do too. The culture has become so dishonest. The bars are full at night, the restaurants brandish fancy corkscrews, the liquor stores have more flavors of vodka than mixers. What do you mean we don’t drink?

Most everybody does something-- Something to relax, or chill out or socialize more easily. I don’t think it needs apology. If you’re an adult and not an addict, if you can be responsible to your family, your job, yourself, you can handle it.

Too much of anything is not good, too much of pretending we’re something we’re not, is not good either. AA does great work but it doesn’t need to brainwash the rest of us.

So I say, “Here’s to Betty’s new video.” Drink up!! Tomorrow night I may celebrate my new shoes.