Home » Blogs » Marisa Black's blog

Marking the Darkness, Marking the Light

Fri, 12/23/2011 - 13:24
Submitted by Marisa Black

Tonight I'm relishing a sensation. It's deeply rooted in my gut, the same place where the echoes of my orgasm reverberate in the bowl of my belly. Tonight's feeling isn't from orgasm. It is similar, however, being primal, older than language, shimmering under the surface of words.

Sometimes this feeling is fierce and comes like a jolt in my loins. Other times it is soft and languid, comfortable. Most often this belly-based feeling is familiar, in an elusive, smoky way. It carries with it the sense of ancient ways, of DNA linking backward and forward in time, a spiral that folds into and around itself, enveloping me in a cellular knowledge, outside my chattering brain.

I described this feeling last week over a shared meal.

"At this time of year, marking these days, I feel profoundly human. More human than ever, like I'm plugged back in to old-time-humanity-human. I mean, we've been doing this - gathering near the solstice - for years, back, back back, century upon century.

"I think about when we were prehistoric, and it was so dark outside, and the days got shorter and shorter, and we were huddled in caves, begging the light to return. And then one day, it did. The days started to get longer. And then we figured out how to calculate that day, to mark it, to know.

"So when I gather at a candlelit table, and share food with those I love, with my community, I feel a tug in the oldest part of my memory. I feel connected to something much older than anything I usually contemplate. I'm part of that string of humans who have been doing this," I waved my hands to the meal, the candles, the company, "for generations."

When I mark the year this way, on the earth-and-sky holidays, the tick-marks in that groove of an annual cycle, I revisit that memory, the one that feels embedded in me and yet slightly unknown all at once.

Tonight I joined a few dozen folks for a festive and purpose-fed bonfire at a solstice gathering. Last night I communed with myself in the hot tub outside my back door. I star-gazed through the winter skeleton of the wisteria vine, my body floating as if suspended, amniotic. Over the last few days I've been making candles, a tradition I'd set aside, and delight in revisiting.

As I remind myself that tonight is shorter than last night, and tomorrow night will be shorter still, I also remember that the opposite is true for my Bodysex sister Liandra, and all those on the other side of the equator. Their days shorten as mine grow, the light and dark shifting methodically, without regard to the humans huddling, reveling, summering or wintering, celebrating or ignoring.

For me, marking the light and marking the dark keeps me plugged in, my flame fed.

Whatever your tradition or practice or lack thereof, I wish you well for these days and for the changing calendar and for the shared experience of being human.

Finding room for all of me
www.darkgreeny.com

Comment viewing options

Select your preferred way to display the comments and click "Save settings" to activate your changes.

Mairisa you amaze me.

Fri, 12/23/2011 - 15:52
Betty Dodson

Your thoughts, the way you form your words and the life you lead are so very inspirational. I too love the winter soltice but mark it quite differently than you. I'd love to share that hot tub outside your back door and the meal you prepared with love. So I'm with you in spirit as we were back in the Temple serving the goddesss of sexual love and abundance with the priestesses who have re-encarnated as Bodysex sisters. Yes, the DVD will be out soon. That's when we will share our divine sexual energy with all who care to see and to know the power of selfloving.

Newgrange Winter Solstice

Fri, 12/23/2011 - 20:25
mayward


Ancient ireland, the land of Síle na Gig (celebrating sexual women) and Celtic tradiions celebrated the Winter solstice in style. In Newgrange there is a passage grave built at the time of the Pyramids, (the Bronze age) where at the end of the long passage, if the sun is shining at dawn, is a room called the light chamber. This is lit up for a total of 17 minutes for a couple of days. Everywhere else in the tomb is pitch black. The heartbeat of time stretching over millenia unifies us in the celebration of life and death, light and dark. Magic.

mayword how nice to hear from you in this context.

Sat, 12/24/2011 - 03:50
Betty Dodson

Dr. Lulu introduced me to Síle na Gig's maybe 10 years ago. She is our Historian of the Material Culture of Sex. Back then, I called them Sheila-na-gigs. A figure in bas relief sculpted of a woman standing with her legs spread wide, holding her outer vaginal lips open to expose the "vesitbule" (today we call it "split beaver") but we might also name iit the "divine  gateway," one we all Pass through to begin our life on earth. These carvings were found above doorways of churches and other important buildings to be protected by the goddess, the divine orgasmic mother of us all.
I agree we need to re-connect with "the celebration of life and death, light and dark. Magic." Dear Sister Priestess. The creative energy of orgasms alone and with our partners is a sacred celebration. Like the Egyptian Priestesses at Karnak, we raise the sun god each day when we release our joy through the act of self-loving. 

beautiful

Fri, 01/06/2012 - 01:02
Liandra Dahl

I have been a little distracted just recently but I came here to read this specifically and I love it...the picture, the words, the content and the writer. 

I was mesmerised by Marissa working out with her poi on Carlin's balcony and I would love to see her doing it at night with them on fire! Perhaps at the reunion I will get this wish fulfilled. I also love gathering to celebrate for the season of the changing of the light. The solstice and the equinox. The shift of night and day, light and dark. I mark it at each time of year but I definitely feel like a hot tub should have been involved in that for me too. I had a little backyard paddling pool but maybe next year I'll aim for a hottub. 

I miss you Marissa, and all the bodysex group. I have been scoping out flights for August 2012. I will be in New York for the whole month celebrating my sister-in-laws 30th. 

Post new comment

The content of this field is kept private and will not be shown publicly.
By submitting this form, you accept the Mollom privacy policy.