Betty Dodson with Carlin Ross

Better Orgasms. Better World.

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God, I love this woman and I love her gnomes.  First Lady Justice (thank you John Ashcroft) and now garden gnomes:

A West Midlands grandmother has been told to cover up three of her garden gnomes - because they're naked. The cheeky statues, one of a man and two of busty women, stood outside Sandra Smith's door for 15 years, reports The Sun.

But now Mrs Smith, 64, has had to drape little T-shirts over the 2ft ornaments after a neighbour complained they were upsetting her kids. A council official phoned and warned her to put clothes on them because they were causing offence.

Mrs Smith has 200 gnomes and other novelty figures with the usual fishing rods and wheelbarrows in her decorated and brightly lit garden. Her collection has long been a talking point with villagers and visitors in Hunnington, West Midlands.

She said of the naked ones: "They have been here for years and everyone who visits or delivers parcels finds them funny. My grandchildren love them."

But the neighbour, who would not be named, said: "They're childish and pathetic. They should not be in a garden with kids." Bromsgrove Council was unavailable for comment.