Betty Dodson with Carlin Ross

Better Orgasms. Better World.

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I second guess myself every time I step in front of the camera. And that's a first for me. Everything else I do - handling Betty's brand, running the site, papering the deals, managing the bloggers - I take in stride. I seem to lose a bit of confidence when I put myself out there...especially naked.

When Karen (our former intern) met us in Norway, we were up late talking in our hotel room when the subject turned to our Trekant episode. I wasn't supposed to be the vulva model (Betty's Stunt Cunt). It was a complete surprise when I was asked to jump in front of the camera and have a private session with Betty. I remember thinking to myself, "suck it up and put your pussy where your mouth is...you can do this".

Both Betty and Karen shared how they felt my pussy may have been too pretty and maybe it would have been better if the first televised vulva was a bit more "average". I cringed. I'd worried about that. I never want any woman to feel bad about herself because of how I look. It wasn't like I even groomed for the episode but I knew what they meant.

The next day Karen flew back to Copenhagen and we had our last Q&A session at Gay Pride Park in the center of Oslo. We were scheduled to speak in the afternoon with "Queer Youth" - a teen organization. Betty had a horrible chest cold and I didn't think she'd rally. I put her in bed and sent Ranvieg a text saying that she may not be up to it. Ranvieg texted back asking if I'd be willing to speak solo...I thought,  "why would they want to talk with me solo without the great and terrible Betty Dodson?"

Betty has an amazing ability to get herself together even when she feels like shit - she always says, "the show must go on". When I woke her up to see how she was doing, she was up and out of that room in 20 minutes. And Betty was fabulous. The kids loved her. I did a little interpretting during the Q&A (hearing aids aren't perfect) and then we wrapped to loud applause.

Betty was cornered in a matter of minutes and I found myself in a conversations with three teens talking about what it's like for them to be "queer" in Norway. Norway has a population of 5 million with 500,000 in Oslo. For most of these teens, being "queer" and living outside of Oslo means being the only "queer" person living in their town. Hate crimes are quite common (that was fucking shocking). As they shared their lives with me, I understood so clearly why I have always identified as "queer".

In my family, not believing in Jesus was the same as coming out. I was isolated, rejected - the black sheep - unable to ever get out of that box. I was branded a "heathen", an "other" in their world of strict dichotomies. Years later we worked out a relationship of tolerance but tolerance isn't acceptance. There's a big difference. 

Then the conversation turned to Trekant. They'd all seen the episode and shared that every kid in Norway watched that episode. It had gone viral. All the kids wanted to see what a real vulva and orgasm looked like. For them, it was moment in their lives that they'd never forget.

I felt honored...loved...accepted...appreciated. All my insecurity fell away. It doesn't matter what my pussy looks like or what style it is. Looking at the image of a real vulva was the healing. God damn it I love those kids and their honesty. I feel so bullish about the next generation coming of age now. I think they really have it together and get what needs to change in the culture. And Betty and I will be there to answer their questions and cheer them on.

What a wonderful way to end our trip. 

We Suggest: 

I Put My Clit on the Line....Literally

Betty Dodson's Bodysex Workshop

My Confession: I'm Intimidated...No Scared to Head Back to Norway

I Don't Think There's Any Doubt We've Put the Vulva On the Map