There are those times every month when I get hot flashes. I’m not talking about those uncomfortable body temperature spikes often attributable to menopause which I, as a sexagenarian, fortunately do not experience.
No, in this case I’m referring to feeling downright randy and prone to impromptu episodes of ‘backstroke roulette’. So while my hands were dutifully employed, my mind got to pondering about some of my favorite ways to ratchet up sexual energy during solo and paired trysts.
Among the many popular names penned to the penis like dick, cock, dong, pecker, and schlong, one that sticks out is undoubtedly the term ‘boner’. Yep, once a flaccid penis gets engorged with blood and dramatically stiffens, the boner takes on the rigidity and feels nothing less than a good chunk of solid bone. However, there is no actual bone material found in its anatomy unless of course you are a male chimp, bear, gorilla, dog, sea lion, rabbit, mouse, or weasel to name a few of those that happen to be endowed with a penis bone called a baculum or os penis.
I’ve been thinking…how autoeroticism and homoeroticism can be viewed as being not that very different. Consequently, might acts of self-love, such as masturbation, connote to some degree an innate same-sex appeal or curiosity within us?
For example, touching my own phallus is touching a phallus which happens to be attached to me. Geez, what would it be like to exercise my manual dexterity on someone else’s lingam? Might homophobia partially stem from a fear of expressing such a naturally innate appeal or curiosity? I found a gem of an answer in a scene from a comedy movie.
There are some horrendous laws being enacted here and abroad criminalizing masturbation and imperiling LGBT people. My best friend, someone I’ve known for over fifty years, is transgender. She has experienced workplace discrimination and even suffered a couple of serious physical assaults.
Fear of the unknown, disdain for those daring to be different, and contempt for change are hostile emotions fueling politically empowered terrorism that is plotting to strip people of their sexual freedom, dignity, and pursuit of happiness.
America’s premier advice columnist, Dear Abby, received a letter from a distraught young woman. While going through her fiancée’s iPhone she stumbled upon some gay porn sites. Concerned about her beau’s sexual identity and gravely worried about their upcoming nuptial, she posed Abby with the question whether viewing gay porn classified ‘Mr. Maybe’ as a closet homosexual or a reasonable facsimile thereof. Abby referred her inquiry to Larry Flynt and a psychologist. The creator of Penthouse ruled that the likelihood was great her fiancée did indeed have covert homosexual tendencies. The ‘shrink’ suggested people can fantasize about same sex dalliances but that does not necessarily bear any impact on their sexual orientation.
I’ll never forget that fortuitous evening when my relationship with my master took a most drastic turn. Ah, but first let me introduce myself…Maximus is my name, I’m my master’s penis. This picture of me was taken while basking in the sun on a beautiful summer day, something I like to do in great measure, pun intended. I love the balmy feeling of the sun, how my testicles loosen, how my shaft absorbs the vibrant solar energy, all in erotic communion with Mother Nature.
This month’s issue of National Geographic had a myth-busting revelation: that our beloved Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer must be female given that the caribou of North America and the reindeer of Eurasia are the only deer species in which both sexes grow antlers.
Emerging investigative work has shown erectile dysfunction (ED) to be an important risk factor linked to contracting cardiovascular disease and suffering premature mortality.
I am not sharing this tidbit of recent medical research in order to scare the nearly 50+% of US male baby boomers and older men who suffer from partial to complete ED into believing that their future is prescribed with gloom and doom. On the contrary, news of this nature is meant to serve as an affirmation of how important proper maintenance and exercise of our genitalia are to our overall health and longevity especially as we trek into our fifties and beyond.
The palladium window in my living room opens to a view of mature pine trees hugged at their bases by honeysuckle and junipers. Inside, an array of Maya replica clay deity statues seemingly smile in amusement as I sink into the sofa, my bathrobe opens, and my hand slowly moves to my center. My heart beats faster, my lungs expand inside my chest grasped by the anticipation of the pleasure and well-being soon to flow throughout my body, mind, and soul.
I consider myself very fortunate to be approaching midway into my sixth decade on this planet with all my vitals in remarkably good condition. My doctor recently said I have the blood pressure of a teenager, my mother lauds me for having the body of a twenty-something, and my wife has latched on to my rigorous gym regimen and is looking absolutely marvelous.
I recently contacted a news reporter who had sent out an inquiry looking for ways to improve brain health. I’m sure many of the respondents to his inquiry will touch upon diet, exercise, meditation, and an array of supplements as he had requested. I saw this as a golden opportunity to show how our sexuality has profound benefits for brain and nervous system vitality.
Solo and paired sexual activity stimulates the pituitary gland to secrete a number of beneficial hormones such as Growth Hormone and the target hormones resulting in balanced functioning of several endocrine glands such as the sex glands, producers of our key sex hormones estrogen and testosterone. Sex also directly stimulates several areas of the brain including the visual, emotional, sexual arousal, and activity areas.
A while back, a teenager wrote D & R expressing her disgust that her boyfriend and his older brother had engaged in mutual masturbation. I think sexual play among young family members and friends is natural, innate if you will.
By innate, I mean that we are all hardwired to engage in sexual activity and this starts percolating in us at very early ages. It’s part of our psychological and physical constitution. We are by nature sexual beings.
She was quick to reprove me when I held the champagne glass incorrectly and when I attempted to start the toast by clinking glasses before proposing the ceremonial tribute.
A good lesson in social etiquette, just like washing your hands after peeing, right?
Honestly, at home I don’t, but out and about, yea, I usually perform the conditioned disinfecting hands operation. Most people do the same in public restrooms even though, to urinate, contact with one’s own genitals is almost negligible. Self-flushing toilets and urinals preclude the need to touch any hardware used by the thousands of daily lavatory visitors.
I have decided to push the envelope today…I am going to the gym in a pair of athletic shorts sans underwear.
The outline of my frenulum will be evident to anyone who decides to look and take notice. Am I prepping for a modest form of indecent exposure? Or, am I simply enjoying the healthy sensation of affording myself the privilege and beneficence of letting my dick hang, letting it move unencumbered, letting it move rhythmically with the rest of me?
I think it’s due time that men display their unique curves just as women casually flaunt bosom cleavages and pussy folds as mainstream demonstrations of feminine sexuality and aesthetic.
"If both men and women masturbate more, they can bring more harmony to how they see the World."
Above are a marvelous comment and picture sent to me by a young man from Sweden. I am intrigued by the masturbation-harmony link. So just how might masturbation lead to greater harmony in how we see the World?