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How do I Use a Vibrator During Sex with My Boyfriend?

Wed, 04/11/2012 - 09:04
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Dear Dr. Betty,

I find it difficult (impossible) to orgasm without a vibrator, so I am interested in incorporating one into sex with my boyfriend. He is fine with the idea, but I currently use the Hitachi Magic Wand when I masturbate, and for a variety of reasons I feel like that won't work very well during partner sex: I don't live with my boyfriend so whatever vibe I use has to be fairly portable, there's no power outlet particularly close to the bed (and I don't want to get tangled up in the cord anyway--that seems like it would be a mood killer), and one of my favorite positions is missionary, and I think the Hitachi might be too bulky to get in between our bodies.

In any case, I'm wondering if you have any suggestions on a good replacement? It doesn't actually have to be as powerful as the Hitachi--I use it on the low setting and still have to use it through clothes--but I like the deep, diffuse vibrations you get with massagers. Buzzy vibrations centered just on my clit are basically just annoying to me, so I'm sort of suspicious of small vibrators like pocket rockets and bullets. Does the kind of vibrator I'm looking for (smallish, rumbly, fairly powerful, cordless) even exist?

Dear L,

My e-book Orgasms for Two actually has drawings of positions I've enjoyed with a partner while using my Magic Wand. Other vibes that have worked are the Mystic Wand that's fairly new and cordless and the 3rd setting is quite powerful.

The Mystic is like the Wands little sister. The best vibe for missionary is the Eroscillator shaped like an electric tooth brush that has a long cord that reaches most outlets. Check out our sex shop. Although you said you didn't like small clit vibes, the Tango packs a punch and it too might work. Just hold it alongside your clitoris not on it.

Dr. Betty

We Suggest: 
Man on Top Position with Eroscillator
Reverse Cowgirl with the Eroscillator
Woman on Top with Eroscillator
Why Women Think They Can't Orgasm
Liberating women one orgasm at a time

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I'm not so good at multi

Wed, 04/11/2012 - 22:05
Collette

I'm not so good at multi tasking. My boyfriend and I incorporate vibrators into sex play in different ways, but I don't recall that I ever tried using one during intercourse. If I don't come during sex, or even if I do but still want to come again, we sometimes use my toys after he has climaxed. Sometimes I stimulate my clit while he slides a dildo in and out of my pussy. He seems to like it and so do I.

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