Home » Blogs » Betty Dodson's blog

My Husband Slaps Me During Sex, and I Like It. Is This Normal?

Mon, 10/24/2011 - 07:51
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Dear Dr. Betty,

I have been married for 4 years now. Sex have not been great all the time but can't complain much. Like 3 months ago my husband and I were having sex when suddenly I see that he grabs my hair and slaps me in the face. It was not a gentle slap but neither did it hurt. While he was doing this he kept asking me if I wanted for him to keep slapping me...I was not sure what to answer but I also liked it! So my question is my husband did not change his sex style like for years and suddenly this change and he wants to do it every time we have sex. Is this normal?

Dear J,

Instead of asking if your husbands behavior is "normal" I think you need to ask yourself if you would like him to continue or stop. If it excites you then my answer is yes, continue. If not, then by all means say no thanks. The grabbing of hair is enjoyed by many women and some also like to be slapped. It's a display of male dominance that harks back to our days of cave dwelling. It's also common behavior in the BDSM scene where couples discuss and agree upon their limits. He either read this in a book about how to spice up your sex life or he paid a visit to a professional Dominatrix who slapped him and he liked it. I suggest you discuss this after dinner sometime when you are both in a good mood. Nothing better than talking about sex with our significant others instead of trying to read their minds.

Dr. Betty

Liberating women one orgasm at a time

Comment viewing options

Select your preferred way to display the comments and click "Save settings" to activate your changes.

Or...

Mon, 10/24/2011 - 15:00
October (not verified)

Or... He saw it while watching porn. Be prepared for that answer too.

I dunno smacking girls

Mon, 10/24/2011 - 18:18
Jake E

I dunno smacking girls entered my sexual thoughts at about 8 years old and being slapped myself at about 12. He might have decided to express something he'd always wanted to do. 

Decide if you like it

Mon, 10/24/2011 - 20:06
Heylin

Betty has a good point about deciding whether or not you like it and discussing it before hand. Sometimes I'll ask my husband to do stuff like that (although not my face, I would break his damn nose if he ever slapped my face), but some ass slapping or holding me down. It's important to agree on things before hand because once he was being kind of dominant and I wanted him to stop doing what he was doing and it took longer than it should have. Later we agreed that "Get the f*** off of me." was our safe phrase. Definitely agree on your limits and decide on a safeword even if you aren't even getting into BSDM per se.

Post new comment

The content of this field is kept private and will not be shown publicly.
By submitting this form, you accept the Mollom privacy policy.