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I Can't "Get Off" During Intercourse

Mon, 11/22/2010 - 09:27
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Dear Betty,

I'm a 19 year old male. Saturday this girl and I had sex and it was my first time. We had sex for a hour straight. And, she is a beautiful woman...red hair, sparkling blue eyes, petite, perfect chest size, and an amazing butt. She's also intelligent and I admire that I met someone that had exactly what I dream about. However, during sex I was unable to get off, but she did. Also, every time we would switch positions I would almost immediately go soft...of course I was able to get an erection again in a minute tops. Since I was inexperienced about sex and did not have a father growing up I had no one to ask if this was normal.

So I went into a clinic and told them and they got me a referral to a urologist to see if anything was anatomically wrong. My feelings for her go way past sex. She is like a flower to me in the dead of winter that I want to protect from the elements. But, she is moving away from here to get away from the abuse from her step-grandfather. I know I can't reverse the damage that has already been done. But, I would love nothing more than to hold her in my arms and tell her everything will be alright. So do you think that my "problem" is normal or would it be something mentally?

Dear B,

First time sex is amazing. It can set you off on the right foot or it can set you back for years. Your first time sounds wonderful and everything you experienced is well within the range of normal, average to fabulous. You sound like a well above average sensitive and caring young man. I would love nothing more than to hold you in my arms and tell you everything will be alright. Stay in touch with your GF. Nothing is wrong with you sexually. You just need more practice and more time.

Dr. Betty

Liberating women one orgasm at a time

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Not all that abnormal

Jabajawoolu's picture
Sat, 07/02/2011 - 22:42
Jabajawoolu

In the experiences that my friends and I had with our first times and the following years, this was pretty average for us. Between the 3 of us, we all seemed to have great sex with our partners but only ever came approximately half the time. I was blessed and cursed with an abnormally high stamina. Blessed because I can pleasure my partner, but cursed because a lot of the time she cannot go as long as me. You may be fitting into this category. Just keep with your heart and protect the girl. Even if you can't be there physically, emotional support does more than you think. A woman is very fragile and can be built up or broken down by a single moment. Be there during that moment.

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