Betty Dodson with Carlin Ross

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Hi betty,

Ever since I was kid I have been masturbating by sitting up on my hands and knees and rhythmically clenching my vaginal muscles. Now when I hook up with someone and they are touching me down there, I don't get the same effect. What should I do? Help!

Thanks,
N

Dear J,

Time to upgrade your masturbation skills. Go to "First Time Orgasm" and follow my simple directions. Begin by watching yourself in a free standing mirror as you explore your entire vulva. Then focus on your clitoris by touching it with a well oiled finger above, to the side and underneath. After a while, end by doing an over all vulva massage while continuing to watch yourself in the mirror. This will begin to familiarize your vulva with different kinds of touch. Give your sex organ some kind of name, either vulva or a pet name instead of "down there."

.It takes time and patience to change a masturbation pattern. You have accustomed your entire vulva to firm pressure. Now pay attention to how a more direct but lighter form of clitoral stimulation feels. Use plenty of lubrication; touch your clitoris from soft to firm, fast and slow. Later on, experiment with a vibrator. During each masturbation session, spend at least 15 minutes or longer experimenting with clitoral stimulation. To avoid feeling frustrated, finish with "old faithful" by using your familiar pattern. Just remember that practice and patience are the basics of mastering any new sexual skill, and in the process, enjoy yourself.

Dr. Betty