Blogs

If Women Were Assigned Power...

Thu, 03/16/2017 - 08:45
Submitted by Carlin Ross

These are my two favorite paintings from artist Felice House. 

After moving from the Northeast to Austin, she fell if love with the concept of the "West" and thought about the roles women were relegated to, inspiring her to replace the cowboys in iconic (male-dominated) Western art with women. 

Her work says so much about power dynamics and gender roles.  Her paintings are 1.25 life-sized so the women are larger than the viewer, "when you see them in person, people are surprised by the scale. People aren't used to women towering over them."

Just breathtaking.

Has Humping Furniture Damaged My Clitoris?

Tue, 03/14/2017 - 08:10
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Hi Dr Betty!

I am 18 years old and worried about the damage I may have done to my vagina. I discovered I could pleasure myself at 3 years old, by rubbing my clitoris against a sofa arm, and now regularly masterbate using the corner of a wooden desk. I am aware that this is really unhealthy as it is such a harsh movement, and I am worried that I have desensitised my clitoris or damaged it. Furthermore, as I tend to rub on one side, one of my labia majora has become much larger and more stretched than the other, giving my vulva a lopsided look (although I know vulva's come in all shapes and sizes I feel like mine is not normal as my masterbation has unnaturally stretched it).

The Power of the Group Guided the Perfect Experience for All of Us

Tue, 03/14/2017 - 07:57
Submitted by Laura Belle

After taking two Bodysex workshops with Betty and Carlin in New York, I really wanted to share the experience with a group of friends in Ohio. I figured this would give me valuable practice as I pursue my certification as a Bodysex facilitator.

I hosted a movie night and invited seven friends that were curious about my new passion. We watched Betty’s Bodysex Workshop DVD and talked about it. When I asked my friends who would like to join in a circle at my home with me as the facilitator, most were enthusiastic about participating. We set the date for a few weeks later and I began to prepare everything that we needed.

If You Look For The Light, The Light Is What You’ll Find

Sat, 03/11/2017 - 08:39
Submitted by Natasha

“If you look for the light, the light is what you’ll find. And if you think about the light, the light will fill your mind. If you shine on the light, the light comes shining back on you. It’s an old, old story…….. ain’t nothing new.”

Lyrics by Joyce Dancer


The day before this past weekend’s Body Sex Retreat I was emotional and weepy —overwhelmed with the realization that this is really the path I’m on. Only 3 years ago it was all just an idea and yet here I was on my way to the airport to pick up a woman for my 6th Bodysex circle. I felt honoured and grateful that even though this path has been full of both joy and pain, it’s without a doubt the path I’m meant to be on.

How Do I Have a Happy Sex Life When I Get Depressed?

Thu, 03/09/2017 - 08:43
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Hi Betty, first of all I want to say thank you for your work on this site here. It have been interesting coming in here and read about several topics around female masturbation and sex life.

But I was wondering with many people struggling some sort of mental illness like depression and loneliness (the list go on). And how these things do effect sex life and masturbation. It's just a topic I haven't read so much about.

I personally don't use any anti-depresant medicines, but these feelings and moods can really have bad effect on my life (including my masturbation obviously).

Best Arrest Photo from Day Without A Woman

Thu, 03/09/2017 - 08:33
Submitted by Carlin Ross

A big thank you to Tamika Mallory, Linda Sarsour, Carmen Perez and Bob Bland - the four main organizers of the Women's March - who were arrested yesterday protesting outside Trump Tower in nyc for A Day Without A Woman (9 other protestors were also arrested).

This is the best arrest photo ever. Wish I could have been there but motherhood and raising a feminist son is my priority right now. I keep looking for numbers on yesterday's global strike *fingerscrossed*.

Feminism has finally gone mainstream.

Because #PleasureEmpowers

Tue, 03/07/2017 - 08:33
Submitted by Almudena

Yes, this Wednesday is the International Women’s Day, a day for vindication and demand that has also to be a celebration. Let’s make it a day to celebrate our own pleasure as well.

Because – pleasure empowers

Because celebrating both life and pleasure is the best way of facing all denial over our own body and our own sexuality. Because your pleasure is yours alone, and nobody can tell you when, how or with whom getting it rightfully.

Yeah yeah, we know… work, children, house duties, or a thousand small inconveniences we got pushed over… but no! Stop giving excuses, enough is enough.

Get some time for yourself, dedicate to your own pleasure and happiness, just because. A brief moment to connect with our own breathing and our body, with our vulva and our joy.

How I Create Sexual Energy & Desire

Tue, 03/07/2017 - 08:07
Submitted by bila kolbe

There are those times every month when I get hot flashes. I’m not talking about those uncomfortable body temperature spikes often attributable to menopause which I, as a sexagenarian, fortunately do not experience.

No, in this case I’m referring to feeling downright randy and prone to impromptu episodes of ‘backstroke roulette’. So while my hands were dutifully employed, my mind got to pondering about some of my favorite ways to ratchet up sexual energy during solo and paired trysts.

Jacqueline Secor's Vulva Art

Sun, 02/26/2017 - 14:37
Submitted by Carlin Ross

It seems like vulva art is popping up everywhere and I'm loving Jacqueline Secor's work.  Each image captures a "vulva style" and almost all have dangling inner lips.

She began painting vulvas to deal with some body dysmorphia issues she was having living in Utah where there's only one definition of beauty.  Looking forward to viewing more of her work.

What Can I Say When Criticized for Casual Sex & Multiple Partners?

Sun, 02/26/2017 - 14:15
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Hello! Thanks for your time.

I don't know how to respond to people about this. I know the insult isn't justified, but I do like sleeping with multiple guys. People say I put myself at risk too much. Not just about STDs but also for pregnancy. The funny thing, is that I risk being preggo much less often than lots of ppl in relationships do! Like if I hookup a few times a month vs most people who have sex with their partner at least a few times a week.

They say it's different though, since they know each other if a baby happens. But I feel like the overall consequence is the same. Plus I usually take less risk, I'm on BC, use condoms, and usually ask him to pullout even with a condom on. I know plenty of couples that just solely rely on the pill.

Natural Cycles is a Birth Control App as Effective as the Pill

Wed, 02/22/2017 - 08:52
Submitted by Carlin Ross

This is the kind of news that gets my clit rock hard.  Elina Berglund, a nuclear physicist, has developed a birth control app that's as effective as the pill.  All you have to do is take your temperature under your tongue each morning and enter the info into the app.  Then your smart phone lets you know when you're fertile and when you're not.  I would just synch it to my calendar. 

Need Help Explaining to BF How to Touch My Clitoris?

Wed, 02/22/2017 - 08:38
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Dear Betty,

I have been masturbating since a very young child, and thanks to you have progressed from rubbing up against surfaces to touching myself with porn to now preferring my own fantasies with some coconut oil and penetration - these orgasms I have on my own are great! I am 19 years old and am in my first serious relationship. My boyfriend and I have been having sex for 2 months now, and so far has been a good experience.

Who Would Think a Victorian Nude Would Push Buttons

Fri, 02/17/2017 - 15:59
Submitted by Carlin Ross

These nude photographs were part of a Valentine's exhibition at the South Downs Heritage Centre.  After receiving a slew of complaints, the gallery pulled them before rethinking it and reinstating them a few days later.

Incredible that nude photographs from the Victorian era would push so many buttons.  I love the real bodies and the playfulness.  Beautiful.

How Do I Transition From the Barbell to Full Penetration?

Fri, 02/17/2017 - 15:44
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Hi Betty,

I am a 33 old woman who began her masturbation journey after turning thirty. Thanks to the information available on your website, your inspiring books and youtube channel with Carlin, I think I have made steady progress and can now enjoy orgasms using clitoral stimulation alone. I am also able to slowly slide Betty's Barbell in and out of my vagina during the process without any apprehension or discomfort and though it does feel nice when the larger blob makes contact with the vaginal entry point, it is pretty uneventful once the barbell is almost completely inside me.

Is that normal? What does one have to do to enhance pleasure using the barbell?

A Betty Dodson Valentine

Tue, 02/14/2017 - 09:28
Submitted by Carlin Ross

I love the sentiment of this Valentine Betty drew in 1987.

First, she dedicates it to herself (I think she should be credited with the selflove movement) and then the love she has for "all my friends, lovers and strangers all over planet earth".