Blogs

I Don't Understand Why I Don't Like Being Touched

Wed, 07/12/2017 - 08:37
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Hi Dr. Betty,

I feel a bit abnormal for admitting this, but I have never liked being touched. Massages, pedicures, etc. are fine, but I don’t like hugs or kisses, even from my husband. When he touches me I stiffen up and feel very uncomfortable. In order to have sex I have to have at least a glass of wine to relax enough just to stand it.

My Favorite Crotch Shot from National Bikini Day

Thu, 07/06/2017 - 16:31
Submitted by Carlin Ross

God damn it, I love this woman.  In honor of #nationalbikiniday, Amy Schumer published this crotch shot to her Instagram page. 

What's more feminist than body pride and full frontal vulva in this grab-her-by-the-pussy era we're living in?   And let's not forget Amy's Glamour awards speech where she proclaimed that she's "160 pounds and catches mad dick":

Happy Independent Orgasm Day for All Women Everywhere

Tue, 07/04/2017 - 08:09
Submitted by Betty Dodson
Betty Dodson 1967

We had talked about it for several weeks, but still, it was intimidating to actually pull it off. Several big elements in my life had occurred that year; my seven year marriage had ended with a legal settlement that I would receive $500 a month for the first year, $400 the next and then 3, 2 and 1 hundred dollars respectfully for the final years. It was mutually agreed upon by both of us to ease me back into the commercial art world after painting full time in my studio.

At the end of the first year, I was informed there would be no more checks in the mail; he had lost his job, his former secretary was now pregnant and would be giving birth to their first child in eight months. We both got what we wanted; fatherhood for him and freedom for me.

Am I Less of a Woman Because Penetration is Painful?

Thu, 06/29/2017 - 08:10
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Dear Betty,

I'm 17 years old and I'm now in a committed relationship (of 2 years) to where I feel ready and comfortable enough to engage in sexual activities and I am dying to take it to the next level, penetration! I was super excited to try this with my girlfriend (and even a bit nervous of course).

We bought a strap-on and when the time came to do the do, it wouldn't go in! It was extremely painful, but we took our time and slowly got it not even half way in but I was determind to get this thing in me one way or another. As it went depper it was getting more and more painful and burning terribly, and all the while my girlfriend kept encouraging me to keep trying and that it was normal to be that painful the first time, but it just didnt feel right to me.

Pleasure is the Real Power

Wed, 06/28/2017 - 15:23
Submitted by Carlin Ross

Knowing that this past weekend's workshop would be our last shifted something in a very important way - both for us and the women in the circle. If I had to choose one word to describe the weekend, it would be reverance.

I felt a heaviness heading into the weekend, the anticipation of emotion and possible regret. And we'd decided to let the doc crew film our morning together as we set up the room and had breakfast so I had to be camera-ready and "on". Whenever we shoot, I'm always conscious that someone decades from now - maybe even a century - will stumble upon the clip. I want Betty's work to be properly represented. I want to get it all right. I want my words to have meaning.

My Orgasms Were Real But Was My Story?

Thu, 06/22/2017 - 07:45
Submitted by Anonymous
original painting Betty Dodson

I read your recent posts about transformation, a new chapter for you both and it resonated with me. I had been reflecting on the past 6 months since attending body sex and I would like to share my thoughts with you.

When I came back from New York not only was I exhausted, I was really confused. The experience was layered with contradicting experiences. I was elated to have met one of my greatest inspirations and to have shared orgasms with an amazing group of women but I had a big question looming about how honest I was.

I questioned myself for several weeks about my authenticity. My orgasms were real but was my story?

Amber Rose's Bush Shot is Feminism

Fri, 06/16/2017 - 08:29
Submitted by Carlin Ross

Amber Rose posted this full bush shot to her instagram account in support of her branded Slut Walk.  Of course, instagram removed it and I really had to dig to find an unpixelated copy.

I'm not sure why breasts aren't obscene but bush is - you can't even see anything.  "White" feminists called her out for displaying nudity and undermining the cause.  For the record, I'm white and a feminist and I fucing love Amber's bush shot.

From Nun to Bodysex Leader

Thu, 06/15/2017 - 13:10
Submitted by Laurie Joy

There is NOTHING more beautiful, healing and exhilarating than a Bodysex Workshop.

I facilitated my first one today, a baby step that was a Quantum Leap for me personally and for Puritanical New England. Almost a year ago this 64 year old former nun, with life-long “pleasure anxiety” attended a Bodysex Workshop in NYC with Betty Dodson.

It Feels Like I Need to Pee All the Time

Tue, 06/13/2017 - 08:24
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Dear Betty,

I'm hoping you would give me some insights to what's going on. I'm a girl, 21 years, healthy, non sexually active .Almost 2 months ago, I masturbated like once per night for like 5 days to reach an orgasm and it helps me sleep. Is that considered to be over doing it. I kinda just use my fingers to create a vibration and that's it. My real question is that after the 5 days I stopped doing it and I having this feeling like I need to pee all the time!

Megan Jayne Crabbe Found Beauty in the Softness

Tue, 06/13/2017 - 07:47
Submitted by Carlin Ross

I stumbled across Megan Jayne Crabbe's instagram page Body Positive Power and I fell in love.

Above are two pictures of Megan - a before and after her battle with anorexia.  Her message: you can love the body you have now and fuck our diet culture.  She posts pictures and amazing dancing-in-her-panties videos with her giggling rolls of softness:

After doing about 40 Bodysex workshops, I can say that I appreciate all body types.  There's beauty in every dimple, scar, and softness is very appealing (just as much as taut muscle).

Betty's Group Sex Interview in NY Times 1971

Sun, 06/11/2017 - 14:08
Submitted by Carlin Ross

Thank you, John, for sending me the link to Group Sex: Is it 'Life Art' or A Sign Something is Wrong.  This article ran in 1971 at the onset of the Sexual Revolution.  Betty is interviewed and quoted.  Here are some of my favorite Bettyisms:

When I got divorced in 1965, I decided to find out everything I could about sexuality,” she said. “I set about letting go of jealousy and possessive feelings, and understanding I could love more than one person. It was the most important thing I ever did.”

19 Years Old - Will Kegels Better My Sex Life?

Sat, 06/10/2017 - 07:00
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Dear Dr. Betty,

I am a 19 year old interested in doing kegels to better my sex life with myself and a partner in the future.

I'd love to get strong results, and getting a kegel exerciser seems the way to go, except after my research there are several sights and people claiming that it is actually a bad way to go -both unnecessary and not as healthy as doing kegels without it.

What do you say to this?

Dear S,

What I say is "to each her own." Chances are you do not need to get your PC muscles stronger. Actually Kegels were designed for women who had given childbirth and needed to restore the muscles. I simply find using the pelvic floor muscles during penetration while including a vibrator on my clitoris enhances my orgasm.

Truly Being Vulnerable Means I Do So Without Knowing That I Will Be Received

Tue, 06/06/2017 - 09:00
Submitted by Natasha

“Shame is the intensely painful feeling or experience that we are flawed and therefore unworthy of love and belonging.”
Brene Brown

Last month I attended a conference that included a workshop on shame and vulnerability. As I sat listening, the facilitator shared her belief (based on the teachings of the incredible Brene Brown) that when choosing to speak vulnerably we should connect with someone who has “earned the right to hear our story.” She went on to explain that this means someone trusted — “who cares about you and your feelings enough to receive your vulnerability compassionately”.

Should Women with Small Clits Practice a Different Form of Stimulation?

Tue, 06/06/2017 - 08:14
Submitted by Betty Dodson

Dear Dr. Betty,

Howdy & MANY THANKS for this site and your work!!!

The short version: should women with eensy weensy clitoral glans (thanks for the anatomy lesson) practice a different form of stimulation? I've read bunches on your site, watched one of your Orgasm Dr videos, and followed (or tried to) your rock & roll technique (although I am a cheap skate and already sprang for a Hitachi & other things before finding your site and have not invested in the Barbell yet).

Beauty, Strength, Vulnerability & $100M+ at the Box Office

Mon, 06/05/2017 - 07:25
Submitted by Carlin Ross

Wonder Woman has raked in over $100M in its opening weekend - the highest for any superhero film ever.

Gal Gadot is Wonder Woman incarnate and bad ass in real life.  She's Israeli and worked as a combat trainer.  And she was 5 months pregnant with her second child when she did her reshoots.  The director, Patty Jenkins, knew that she wanted to display strength and vulnerability in her character:

"I’m tired of sincerity being something we have to be afraid of doing. It’s been like that for 20 years, that the entertainment and art world has shied away from sincerity, real sincerity, because they feel they have to wink at the audience because that’s what the kids like. We have to do the real stories now. The world is in crisis.